A Valentine’s gift to future you Removing the barriers that stand between you and true love Dear Reader, Valentine’s Day has a way of stirring things up. For some, it’s flowers and candlelight.For others, it’s loneliness, comparison, or the quiet ache of wanting something deeper. Culturally, we’ve reduced love to romance and performance.Dinner reservations.Perfect captions.Proof that someone chose you. But love — real love — is not a holiday. It’s a practice. And most people were never taught...
8 days ago • 1 min read
Uncomfortable Conversations What Standing at the Altar Really Means Dear Reader, This weekend, my partner and I marked our ten-year anniversary by entering into several deep and challenging conversations about the state of our union. We also danced, decorated our Lunar New Year tree, made mouth-watering gumbo, and enjoyed watching the snow fall outside our window. Alongside the celebration, we chose to take an honest inventory—naming what we cherish in our relationship, and where friction has...
27 days ago • 2 min read
Giving the Game Away: When Strategy Ends and Truth Begins Dear Reader, Most people are taught—early and quietly—that relationships are a game.Who texts first.Who cares more.Who holds back to stay safe. This way of relating is so common it becomes invisible.But over time, it hollows things out.What begins as protection becomes distance. In relational work, there is a moment that marks a true threshold.It’s the moment someone chooses to give the game away—on purpose. Not by accident.Not in a...
about 1 month ago • 3 min read
Who Wants Inner Peace? The gentle yet powerful approach of shadow work. You know the saying, “Inner peace brings world peace.”For some, that can sound trite.Especially when life feels full, tender, or overwhelming.And still—the truth remains: we are co-creating this world one choice point at a time. January is a threshold.A gentle landing after the fullness of the season.A chance to clear what feels heavy, reconnect with your heart, and soften back into your center. In January, I’m hosting a...
2 months ago • 1 min read
Love Without Losing Yourself A note on attachment and the courage to stay you Dear Reader, There’s a kind of love many of us long for —a love where we don’t disappear to stay connected,and we don’t harden to stay safe. A love where both people get to stay whole.A love where you don’t lose yourself. And if you’re reading this, you might know these moments well:When you care about someone, but you shrink yourself just to keep the peace. When closeness feels good in theory, but overwhelming in...
3 months ago • 4 min read
A Soft Homecoming A Gentle Invitation Before the Holidays Begin Dear Reader, I’ve been thinking of you all as we enter this season. I know November often brings that subtle tension — the sense that the season is picking up speed and asking more of us. As the holidays approach, it’s easy for our energy to get stretched thin and for our inner worlds to feel worn down and neglected. This time of year brings a deep paradox:our bodies naturally want to slow down, rest, and turn inward…while our...
3 months ago • 1 min read
A Soft Homecoming A Gentle Invitation Before the Holidays Begin Dear Reader, I’ve been thinking of you all as we enter this season. I know November often brings that subtle tension — the sense that the season is picking up speed and asking more of us. As the holidays approach, it’s easy for our energy to get stretched thin and for our inner worlds to feel worn down and neglected. This time of year brings a deep paradox:our bodies naturally want to slow down, rest, and turn inward…while our...
3 months ago • 1 min read
The Quiet Cost of Pretending Why you were never meant to work this hard for love. There is a cost to belonging that no one talks about. Belonging is one of the strongest forces in the human body. From the moment you’re born, the body scans for connection. The nervous system will twist itself for it, work for it, and even sacrifice your truthfor it. Is it safe to reach?Is it safe to be seen?Is it safe to be me? When belonging feels shaky, the body starts shaping itself around what it thinks...
3 months ago • 3 min read
The Body Keeps Score in Love, too. When love stops feeling safe, the body carries the cost. Photo credit: Victor Habchy Hi Reader, In the dance of love, there are two equal destroyers of health: constant conflict and quiet disconnection. When a relationship becomes a battleground — or turns into a quiet, empty space where no one really reaches — the body pays the price. Chronic relational stress builds what science calls allostatic load: the accumulated wear and tear that stress leaves on...
4 months ago • 4 min read